Monday, July 20, 2009

11 Weeks!

So, I'm still getting up the nerve to post a picture. This is for the following reasons:

1. I'm vain as Hell
2. I look like Hell

So, I've been suffering from Bad Hair for approximately 15 months. I have gone through 2 hair stylist break-ups in the past year resulting from (1) multiple "mom" haircuts from my previously fave stylist- I was in denial and (2) a stylist who stared at himself in the mirror the whole time he was cutting my hair. Result= Fugly Ass Hair for 15 Months.

I've also got the worst combo of old lady (Wrinkles! Fuck!) and adolescent (Acne! Fuck!) skin.

Did I mention none of my clothes fit right? Oh, and I need a new bra like Lindsey Lohan needs rehab. BAD. The renaissance festival is in town and I could totally get a job as one of their wenchy people. The cups floweth over.

Oh, and I'm carrying these babies in my face, ass, calves, and arms. I look like the pilsbury dough boy.

How far along? 11 weeks
Total weight gain/loss: Mysterious. Avoiding the scale like the plague. But I bet each of my boobs has gained 5 pounds
Maternity clothes? Friday the Bella Band knock-off became a reality. So far my review is "meh."
Stretch marks? Not yet
Sleep: I heart naps for evah
Movement: None.
Food cravings: Anything not tied down. I wasn't craving it, but I had a piece of cake at work. HEAVEN!!!
Gender: Still a mystery!
Labor Signs: None
What I miss: Pooping
What I am looking forward to: Ultrasound on Thursday!!!
Milestones: Having my clothes officially NOT FIT.And getting belly rubs!


  1. I think your updates are awesome and a great way to keep your readers in the loop, progress-wise. I'm totally jacking this idea for my blog!!

    Thanks for the inspiration!

  2. FYI.. I'm blog-stalking you.. :) I'm about two weeks behind you, pregnant with twins, and could tell from the first two entries at the top of the page that I dig your humor. If you won't post a pic of yourself.. how about an u/s pic??